Sunday, February 7, 2010

Saying No

Why of why do people think that I must have all of the free time in the world simply because I am a stay at home mom??

There is a certain stereotype that comes with the territory when you stay at home with your children I have found out, and its not very pleasant. And it's a stereotype that only someone who has never been a stay at home mother could invent.

Sometimes I feel like a sucker. I'm constantly asked to run other people errands, watch other peoples children, volunteer for more than my share of activities, etc. And without fail, every single time that I am asked to do such an activity I always get "well you have the free time since you're not working" or "You're just sitting at home anyways".

Here is where the part about me feeling like a sucker comes into play. I don't know how to say No.

I realize that by constantly saying yes to these types of requests not only am I stretching myself thin but I'm also fueling the stay at home mom stereotype. But the truth is that I feel bad when someone askes me to do something for them and all I want to do is say no. The guilt gets the better of me and before I know it "sure" or "no problem" is passing between my lips.

Learning to say No is on my immediate list of things to do.

So moms, what is your best way to say No?


  1. I just want to say that this post was for ME. Well that's what I'll like to believe anyway.
    Thank you for that, I've been feeling the SAME frustrations.

  2. Me too!! But a few times recently when people have asked me to do things that I really didn't WANT to do, I actually said no. It was not easy, but I just took a second to remember how the eleven billion previous times I was in that situation and said yes, I had regretted it a lot. I thought of the things I'd rather be doing with my time and just said that I was too busy and couldn't. And guess what happened? The person who frequently thought I was somebody she could just dole out her assignments to stopped asking me so much. I still sometimes fall into the trap, but sometimes I don't now, and when that happens, it feels great!

  3. tell them there's a reason you're a stay-AT-HOME-mom.. and that you need more of that "at home." :)

  4. Aw, that sucks... Right now, I don't have that problem... but I don't have any kids in school or preschool or playgroups, so I don't end up stuck in situations... I'm sure that will change...


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