Just now - seriously, like two minutes ago - I started up my computer for the first time in over three weeks. Why? you may wonder. Was I using the computer-free time to play with my kids more? Was I using that computer free time to clean my house? Cook gourmet meals a la Natalie?
Oh heck no. My computer was broken and I spent the last three weeks going CRAZY.
It's funny how the internet has changed life for us modern day mamas. Being an at-home-mom/work-at-home mom... or any kind of mom, really... can be so isolating. Young kids are hard to shuffle around in the mini-van (seriously, who likes being stuck in a car with kids?), play groups are not always very fun (I've joined and quit two of them) and, for the handful of moms with anxiety disorders who don't drive as a result (um... like me, for example) getting out of the house with kids doesn't happen too often.
So, when your computer blips out and is out of commission for 3 weeks, let me tell ya... the insanity sets in after about 5 minutes. I've been going crazy. Just the idea of not being able to read my morning blogs while the girls eat their breakfast and I wait for my coffee drip to work made me want to go straight back to bed. The idea of not being able to log onto Facebook to say hi to my other at-home-mom friends during that slump in the afternoon when my non-napping kids have irritated my every last nerve, literally made me cry.
But the worst part was that I felt so lonely! All my mom groups/blogs/friends were unreachable. I didn't have anyone around to say. "Oh don't worry, Marisa. It gets easier when they start school" or "Wow, that Annelie really is a rotten little stinker... (hugs)" -- and believe me, I needed some major virtual hugs these past three weeks. I felt like I lived in my own little world and had no way of reaching human beings dealing with the same things I was - temper tantrums, biting, and napless days, to name a few.
Granted, I did try to use my time wisely. I didn't just stare at the blank space on my desk where my computer used to sit, with tears streaming down my face. I actually stuck my sewing machine there instead, and sewed my kids a new wardrobe of colorful twirly skirts. I pulled out countless sheets of paper and outlined the Great American Novel (hey - a girl can dream, okay?). I watched all of those movies I've always wanted to watch but never had the time (actually thats a lie. I watched Becoming Jane about 100 times, but who can blame me... Regency James McAvoy, yes please!).
So hello! I'm back! You might not have noticed I was gone, as I was posting old posts from my other blog while I was away... but believe me, I NOTICED! And having a computer back, being on the internet again, REALLY makes me appreciate being a 21st century internet mom.
xoxo,
Glad you are rewired!! Missed you very much :)
ReplyDeleteWelcome back, Chica! :o) I could say I missed you, but you were never gone. And I have your number, numerous times, on my caller id to prove it. :oP
ReplyDeleteCongrats on surviving sans-internet! I don't know if I could have held up as well.
YEAH!!!!! We missed you! Be on the lookout out for a little pick-me-up in the mail from me!!!
ReplyDeleteGood to have you back!
ReplyDeleteP.S. Gourmet? You give me way too much credit :)
ReplyDeleteGlad you're back! I really missed your blogging!
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